KAMBILANGATAW- What Maranaos Must Be

I have always wanted to write this article because the concept of Kambilangataw intrigues me. When Maranao elders learn that I reside in a Christian-infested area, they never fail to remind me, “Bibilangataw ka san owm.” I would respond in the positive but I always wondered, what does kambilangataw really mean? The concept seemed vague although deep inside, I know what it signifies. I just couldn’t find the exact words to describe its true meaning.

I sought help from my aunts, namely Auntie Normallah Lucman Pacasum, Auntie Viol Tamano Marohombsar, and lately, Auntie Norhata Alonto. I was able to interview Auntie Viol briefly, Auntie Normallah promised to give her answers in the future, and Auntie Norhata answered the questionnaire I gave her through email. These were the ladies I asked for information because they know their historic culture and they are bilangataw women themselves.

According to Auntie Norhata, kambilangataw is the art of living the Maranao culture, imbibed with the Maranao values and traditions. These were handed down from the oldest generations of Maranaos whose roots can be traced from the Orang Padang of Menangkabaw, Indonesia, and a highly matriarchal society, whereby women earn their living and most men stay home to rear their children. “Other cultures have come to play in the devolution of the Maranao Society, and kambilangataw is the perfection of all the mores that help describe a Maranao, particularly a Maranao woman,” claimed Auntie Norhata.

From what I have gathered from these honorable women, a bilangataw is a person who is decent, righteous, moral, respectful, and sensitive. He or she takes into consideration always the family’s well-being and that of the community, exemplifying decency in his or her daily life. Even though one is well-traveled and globally competitive, he or she can never be a bilangataw if one does not show and exude deference to him/herself and to those around him or her.

A bilangataw woman is modest, forthright if so needed, and at the same time, competent and proficient especially in times of difficulties. Being morally upright, she must make sure she does not commit any act or deed that is against the Maranao society.

Ideally, the bilangataw must be socially oriented and knowledgeable in the Maranao arts, songs, instruments, dances, and food. Auntie Viol said, “She knows the taritib and igma (tradition and culture).” She must exercise genuine hospitality to her family, friends, acquaintances, and visitors. She must learn how to be patient but must be enraged in defense of her maratabat (pride). She must not talk badly of others, must show concern for the welfare of the people who mean to her in times of hardships, and at the same time be there for her family constantly.

Auntie Norhata said, “Even in the highly globalized world we live in now, a bilangataw woman must know her limitations and must not bring disgrace to her family and community. What makes a Maranao woman luckier nowadays is the Islamization of the Maranaos. The Shahria Court is a big relief to the Maranao women who in the past were too constrained to even fight for their own rights and live in silence and die in pain. Some Maranao values have been remolded and corrected by the strengthening of Islam among the Maranaos. One big example is the Maranao practice of arranging marriages for their children of which I admit my husband and I are guilty of. It was only lately that we realized that it is wrong to compel your son or daughter to marry someone he or she does not approve of. But Muslim parents may guide their children in their choices and pave the way for their decisions but they cannot and must not dictate.”

I asked Auntie Norhata what if a bilangataw woman commited a grave mistake, would that mean she can never be a bilangataw for the rest of her life? She said, “I personally believe that as a Muslim she must not be totally condemned lest she becomes embolden and goes farther astray and away from Islam. She must be given a fair chance and must be protected by her family. She may not be treated well by the majority but honesty and sincerity can help heal wounds through time.”

What makes us different from the other non-Maranao women is our lifestyle of being a bilangataw. It helps define who we are and adds to our identity. Being a bilangataw is something we can be totally proud of.

I try very hard to be a bilangataw every day, and most especially in my travels around the country where my principles are always challenged. So far I have succeeded I presume mainly because I bear in mind that I bring with me the entire Maranao community. Oh yes, I have fumbled once in my past but then, I am also just a human being, created to be imperfect and vulnerable. What is important is my present as well as my future. I will make sure that as I travail the roads of my destiny, I will hold my head up high, cautious this time, and proud to be a Maranao, a bilangataw at that. For me it is not too late to be a bilangataw because a woman has her lifetime to be one.

To sum it up, a bilangataw is not just a woman, but a LADY.